A Senior's Day

For those who think Senior citizens have nothing to do all day, below find a guest post from my brother Joe about a typical day. Joe is 81 and a retired NYPD sergeant. After his wife Anita died almost 11 years ago, Joe found a companion in Norma. In the process he adopted her family, or they adopted him. Bri and Matthias are Norma's great grandchildren who are both doing well at Joe's high school alma mater, Msgr. McClancy in Queens. I retain Joe's unique spelling and grammar.

 Here is a run down of my day’s activities.

I start off the day by checking my iPad, first for my sleep apena results. Note today’s reading 0.9 great. Next I have some oj and cherios with raspberries and blackberries as blueberries are weigh too high. They have a new gimmick as they pack the blue berries in a larger container but it’s really the same 1 pint. At $5.99, come on, man.

Next I have a teleconference with my sleep apena Dr., the modern wonder as you don’t have to go to the office and wait. She goes over my results with me and says the machine and me are working very well. I ask her to go over the setting on the machine as I had to adjust the humidity, since it seemed I was getting water boarded. You're doing great she says see you in 6 months. Pay co pay later.

Norma's son John will take us to 14th and 4th ave, union square for her therapy session at 1230. Afterwards I will take Norma to the Polish bakery for coffee and a roll, ok I cheat and have a danish, best prices in Williamsburg.

So far so good, as I await Bri softball game which will be played in Staten Island at 430 pm. I am going to watch it on my iPad as traffic is horrendous at that time.

Suddenly, I get a call from Bris father, Richie. Game canceled, he is not happy. He informs me that Brianna will be going to Cheerleading from 6-8pm and could I pick her up as he is taking Matthias to a college fair. Ok.

I now go early to the school hoping that they finish early. As I have about 3/4 of an hour,I start reading my book on Auschwitz. Note, almost finished the authors 5  years in captivity is over, but not his post traumatic ordeal. It’s now 8 pm and no signs of the kids, I call mom and ask her if she picked up Bri? She says Bri knows you are picking her up. Terror. Finally at 825 pm Bri says she coming out. These cheerleaders practice more than the soft ball team. In January, they will be going to Disney for a tournament. Bri get in and as usual asks if we can get something to eat, as she no longer likes Mcds, we go to her favorite deli by her house for grilled chicken sandwich.

Matthias come out and asks me about Columbia, I wanted to tell him you don’t go there to play baseball but say that’s where my friends nephew went before transferring to Vanderbilt, note he went on to play 10 years in majors. One good thing about it being 9 pm is there is no traffic.

I now go home and Norma says where have you been? I change the channel to see the Phillies lose in the 11th, 2-1. As I am now eating a cup of yogurt, I check my emails,Trump is upset that I don’t respond to him, I never should have bought that hat in 2016. Next I see that the kids mom, Antoinette, has sent me two emails re first marking period and except for an 89 in Bris algebra all 100 and 99s. Are the teachers at McClancy judge fans with the 99s?

Question how many women other than Antoinette Funicello do you know with that name? After all these years, I am a 5 year old boy upstairs at 4911 69st and mom is making me sunnyside up eggs, I loved the way the end was crispy. Never was able to do that.

Well, almost finished, but before that I check to see how the Giants are doing against The eagles. What they beat the Super Bowl champs, now that’s another story.

I almost forgot that some where between all this , I took Norma to bank and tried to have her son put on her account, even though I know her passcode. Prior to this at another branch the female rep said technically I was not supposed to do her banking.Funny the ITM machine, never said you are not Norma. Can you imagine Baba going to an itm machine. Different world.

It’s not over as Norma ask I could stop at the pharmacy to get her non diabetic cough syrup.

Ok, with all this when did I take my 9 pm meds? I carry backup meds in my wallet

Now that I have either amused or bored you , have a good day, as Richie for now is picking up the kids today. If you think this is too much, Remember, the Lord only gives you what you can handle.

Forgot, as I was driving to school, the song Forever Young came on the radio as Brianna must have switched the channels.

Ps . 15 days to Daemen first gave, October 25, the day I joined the NYPD. Going to be hard to watch without # 3 in lineup.

Bri softball coach gave her #20 shirt, she was always #1 but will have to wait until his daughter graduates. At least unlike Matthias she is playing.*

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*Matthias is a Senior with an "A" average who also pitches for the Varsity baseball team. Bri is a Freshman who made the girl's Softball Varsity team.

Advice for Seniors

 My brother-in-law Richard Gardella moved to a Senior living facility two years ago  at the age of 88. For most of his life he was a practicing attorney but from his earlier days as a newspaper reporter he loved to write about people. He still believes that everyone has their story. In his new home he has continued his practice of writing by profiling the seemingly ordinary people who reside in the facility as well as members of the staff. His first profile was about Larry Kirby, a decorated veteran of WWII, who published a book, Stories From the Pacific, about his experience during the war. Larry died at the age of 99 shortly after Richard completed his profile. In that profile Richard included Larry's written advice to seniors entering the facility. It is good advice for anyone, and I repeat it here with Richard's permission. 

Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time around bitter people will make you feel older and harder to be around.

Try to keep a healthy life. Pains and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as part of life. Try doing moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. It is easy to become sick, and it is hard to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. 

Don’t stress over the little things from the past. You’ve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Small issues will soon be forgotten. Feel good in the now! 

Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love life, love your family, love your friends, and remember: Love is more precious than the finest jewels.

Be proud, both inside and out. Don’t stop going to your barber or hair salon, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.

Don’t lose sight of fashion trends for your age but keep your own sense of style. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you—keep it, and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.

Always stay up to date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised at what old friends you’ll meet.

Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideas as you, but they are the future and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today. Never use the phrase: “in my time.” Your time is now. As long as you are alive, you are a part of this time.

Never regret not living with your children or grandchildren. Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our own space. They need theirs and you need yours.

Don’t abandon activities. Each evening after dinner, check the activity sheet and the next day get involved in at least one activity. Be active, be friendly, be happy.

Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are.

If you’ve been offended by someone—forgive them. If you’ve offended someone—apologize. Don’t drag around resentment with you. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Forgive, forget, and move on with your life.

Laugh. Laugh away your worries. Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long life. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. Dear friends, enjoy a peaceful time at this point in your life.

Don’t worry…be happy. 

Larry Kirby in WWII.

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